Sticks and Stones....

I learned the value of forgiveness, many years ago. That doesn't mean I'm accomplished in it. New trials pop up every day, tempting one to harbor contempt and some of them are really hard to overcome. Nobody on this earth is perfect. Not by a long shot. So many times I have read or heard these messages of forgive and forget like God does. To me it seems like they don't wish to confront the sin as mentioned in Matthew. To me it’s a contradiction of scripture. I mean which is it? Confront sin or forgive and forget? It seems to me this is handled upon the parties comfort level. If they don't wish to face the abuser - forgive and forget is used. We can forgive and forget as the saying goes if the person turns from their sin, but if they are constantly asking for forgiveness for the same sin? There is no heart change there, and that is what God asks of everyone. It seems discernment needs to be used.

I feel like I truly understand why I need to forgive those who have caused pain in my life. Do you remember that saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but WORDS will never hurt me.” Boy, as often as I used that ridiculous saying when I was a little tyke; it was actually the complete opposite of what the truth would come to be.  Words have/do hurt, especially when they come from someone you love and thought loved you…. Friends that have been through so much with you, give promises that were made to seem to be genuine, but sadly broken. Words hurt. And because of the hurt, this ugly word made a home in my heart. Bitterness….. Oh I am far too familiar with that ugly word. I kept a lot of it stored up for someone that was extremely important in my life, or so it seemed. I was told things that pierced my heart in a way that I thought I could never get over. I never wanted to get over. But who asked what I wanted? I think that’s when it went all wrong, when I tried to write my own plan, and travel this journey and hope it all worked out for the best. If only I wasn’t so foolish and immature with my selfish thinking. But thankfully, my eyes have been opened. I now see it as God's way of telling me he doesn't long for us to harbor contempt and other burdens that would hold us down. He wants us to let it go, and to seek prayer and open our heart to love again. (As difficult as it tends to be sometimes) Forgiveness is a tool to have a heart change as God would wish us to have. Abusers will ask for forgiveness, and it’s NOT for them! They use this as a tool to wipe the slate clean, but God is asking for a heart change. 

And that’s what I’ve done….. I have forgiven you. As I also pray to be forgiven. 

Two letters....

Dear Jesus: 

I know You must feel like no one is paying attention, but I am. I know it seems we are all sleeping, but You have woken me up. Me and my friends. Thank You. I know it seems like no one is listening to Your Word anymore, forgive us. Teach me Your heart and help me to teach others. Thank You for the courage to speak out for You. Thank You that You have shown me how to pray for things more important than myself. Thank You that You are calling people in increasing numbers. I know so many people doubt You even exist, what pain that must cause You. I will spend my life telling them about You. Thank You that I am awake, aware, redeemed and forgiven. Thank You that You have given us the weapon of Your Word to fight the enemy of this world. Thank You for fighting for us. 

-I love You, Lord.

I run to You!

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Attention satan:

I know you think no one is paying attention, but I am I know you think that we are all sleeping, but I am wide awake. So are my friends. I know you think you can sneak around in the shadows, but I am calling you out. I know you think that no one knows the Word of God anymore, but I do. And I am teaching others. I know you think we are all afraid to speak out against you, but I am not. I know you think no one prays for unselfish things anymore, but there are many of us and our numbers are growing. I know you think you’ve convinced people you don’t exist. But I know where you live. Me and my friends -we are aware, awake, praying, and we know what the Word of God will do to you when applied correctly. We see you. We know your fate.

~Run.